Fear Jokes

How do you get over a fear of elevators?

Just take some steps to avoid them!

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Which 3 words will make a mexican tremble in fear ?

Round of 16

What's a redditors worst fear?

What's a blind mans worst fear ?

A prius

What do girls fear that's big, scary, and pink?

The Alaskan Bull Worm.

What did the policeman do to his fear of the dark?

He shot it.

What do you call a fear of chainsaws?

Logic.

What's white, black, and can smell fear?

deez nuts.

What one noun, verb, and US President sums up a scientist's hopes and fears?

Grant.

What Pablo Escobar And Other Narcos Fear Most?

LEGALIZATION

What do you call it when a person has a fear of Vietnamese food?

They have a Pho-bia!

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Why did the psych ward escapee never get married?

He had a fear of commitment

Why dont Demons fear oxidation?

Because there's no rust for the wicked

Why are a German vegetarians pessimists?

Because they always fear the wurst.

What do you call a fear of Alkaline?

A pH-obia

Why do Germans fear hotdogs with cheese?

Because for them, it is a Wurst-Kase scenario.

Why couldn't the Geordie go above the seventh floor in the tower block?

He had a fear of eights

How much wood can Chuck Norris if Chuck Norris could chuck wood?

Chuck Norris would just stare at the wood, and it would chuck itself out of fear.

What weapon is most feared by knights?

A can opener.

What's the similarity between pessimists and people with a phobia of sausages?

They both fear the wurst

Why don't nervous vegans visit Germany?

They fear the wurst!

What do you call a fear of deadly snakes?

Common sense.

Which day do chickens fear most?

Fryday.

Why did the Soviets pull their missiles out?

Because they feared a premature ejectulation

What's ur biggst fear?

Child1: Ghosts! Child2: Dogs! Child3: That humanity's core reaction to misunderstanding is anger

What's a vampire cows worst fear?

Steaks.

Who is the Sith Lord of fear?

Count Spooku

What day does the egg fear most?

Fry-day

What do you call the fear of chainsaws?

Common Sense. I'll show myself out...

What disease do horses fear most?

Hay Fever!

What do you call a fear of horned bovines?

Aurochnophobia.

Why cant a Mexican man sleep with three women at once?

Fear of over dos

Which disease do hobbits fear the most?

The Bilbonic plague.

What is snow?

No one would say: It's doubtful an Eskimo would have Chionophobia, a fear of this.

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Prius Jokes More Prius Jokes

What's a blind mans worst fear ?

A prius

What's the difference between a porcupine and a Prius?

Porcupines have pricks on the outside

Vietnamese Jokes More Vietnamese Jokes

What did the Vietnamese architect say to the Chinese post man?

What did the Vietnamese architect say to the Chinese post man? CHING CHONG

What do you call it when two Vietnamese people meet?

A Nguyen-Nguyen situation

Avoid Jokes More Avoid Jokes

Why should you avoid people dressed as celery?

They could be stalking you!

What's your first name?

Avoids

Grant Jokes More Grant Jokes

What did the cop do when his Sergeant did not grant him the vacation he requested?

Shot a black man.

Whats the difference between a genie and a genius?

A genie grants wishes, while a genius wishes for grants.

Pablo Escobar Jokes More Pablo Escobar Jokes

What was the best part about Narcos Season 2?

SPOILERS Tata, Pablo Escobar

What was Pablo Escobar's favourite pool party game?

Narco Polo.

Deez Nuts Jokes More Deez Nuts Jokes

What do you get when you click to see the punchline?

DEEZ NUTS

What's 6 inches long and 2 inches wide and drives women wild?

deez nuts

Elevator Jokes More Elevator Jokes

Why does riding in an elevator make ghosts happy?

It lifts spirits

What's the difference between an elevator and a black guy?

The elevator can raise a child.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Where do men have the most curly hair?

In Africa

What was the man running around ?

from my 5yr old son Because he wanted to catch some sleep.