Name Jokes

What do you call a stupid kid in pre-school?

Names.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
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How does a black mother tell her children apart?

She remembers them by their last names.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch?

Names!

What do you call a kid with an eye patch, braces and a lisp?

Names

What was Rudolph's nickname?

Names. Because they used to laugh and call him Names. Credit to my dad.

What do you call a kid with no legs, no arms and an eyepatch?

Names.

What do you call a boy with no arms and an eye patch?

Names! -Bo Burnham

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs?

Names

What do you call a boy with no arms and an eyepatch????

Names

How does she tell them apart?

Their last names.

What do you call someone with one arm and no legs?

Names

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug
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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch?

Names.

What do George Michael and Carrie Fisher have in common?

Both their first names have six letters. That's it. For now. Edit: they're both dead.

How to lose a gf: Gf: which of my friends would be the most fun to have a 3some with?

Me: *names two of them*

What is the difference between a English actuary and a Sicilian actuary?

An English actuary can tell you how many people are going to die next year. A Sicilian actuary can give you their names...

What were their names?

Hot and Cold.

Which two names figure prominently in every Ape's diet?

Ben/Anna!

How did she tell them apart?

She looked at their last names...

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in a high school?

Names

How to make your God proud?

By abusing his names in other languages.

What medications do I take?

I'm not sure. The names on my neighbor's prescription bottles are ridiculously long

What do you call a kid with no arms and legs and severe Down syndrome?

Names

How can you tell the difference between all the banjo songs?

A: By their names.

Why don't you try calling them names too?

Steve: "I can't, they're so beautiful"

What did the black mother name her 5 daughters?

Tyrone, Tyrone, Tyrone, Tyrone, and Tyrone. How did she tell them apart She called them by their last names!

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eye patch?

Names.

What do you call a kid with an eyepatch and no limbs?

Names.

Why are there broken condoms on the couch?

Wife: Would you please call our children by their names!

What did the dumb blonde say when told that "Scheherezade" was composed by Rimsky-Korsakov ?

A: "Why'd his mom choose to call him Rimsky of all names !! "

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Asian Jokes More Asian Jokes

What do you call an Asian gangster wearing a blue bandana?

A rice crippy.

What's black, white, asian, and mexican?

A lazy panda.

Darling Jokes More Darling Jokes

What happened when a man fell in love with a grand piano?

He said "Darling you've got lovely teeth."

What's your Mom's name?

Kid: Mom's last name must be "Darling" because that's what Daddy calls her every time.... Teacher: That's so sweet. What's her first name then? Kid: I think it's "Sorry"....

Face Jokes More Face Jokes

What did the ghost say to the other ghost at the Halloween party?

Let's get sheet-faced!

What is the worst thing about getting hit in the face with PI?

It never ends.

3 Jokes More 3 Jokes

What are the three kinds of women's cancer?

1. Breast Cancer 2. Ovarian Cancer 3. Feminism

What is 1 + 1"?

The mathematician says "2" The Physicist says "2, plus or minus 0.1" The engineer says "Probably around 2, but let's say 3 to be on the safe side".

Coffee Jokes More Coffee Jokes

Why do programmers drink coffee so much?

So they aren't lying when they say they like Java.

Why doesn't Coffee get along with milk in Germany?

Cause it doesn't want to be latte. Sorry. I just came up with this lame joke. Downvotes ahoy!

Credit Jokes More Credit Jokes

What did Drake Bell say to Batman?

Sorry, still calling you Bruce! I found this on Facebook somewhere; I dunno who to get credit to.

What did the sister cell say to her sister cell when she stepped on her foot?

Ow Mytosis! Credits to Amanda Damiani

Bedroom Jokes More Bedroom Jokes

Why is pinocchio so good in the bedroom?

He nose what he's doing

Where would you find the emo kid at his birthday party?

Just *hanging* out by himself in the bedroom

Irene Jokes More Irene Jokes

What do you call Chinese woman with one leg?

Irene.

What do you call an Asian lady with one leg longer than the other?

Irene