Word Jokes

How many words can you type a minute?

ME: Probably all of them BOSS: What do you mean ME: Well, like for example, pickle

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
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Why are people still using a dictionary?

I just type the words into Google and see if it corrects me.

What word begins with "N" and ends in "R" that I wouldn't want to call a black guy?

Neighbor.

What two words have thousands of letters in them?

Post office.

What word starts with M and ends in arraige and is a man's favourite thing?

Miscarriage. This joke never gets old, just like the baby.

What would you say are your strengths?

Me: Words Him: Can you say more Me: More Him: Me: I'm also good at directions

What is another word for a python ?

A mega-bite !

What word starts with F and ends in uck?

Firetruck. The answer is Firetruck.

Why do bees hum ?

Because they've forgotten the words !

How many syllables does the word "Gloria" have?

CATHOLICS: 18

What's another word for cinnamon?

Synonym.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug
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What two words have the most letters?

Post office.

When you guys describe me to your families do you use the word tigress?

I'd prefer if you included tigress

What do rappers use to write their lyrics?

Word,yo.

What do me and Mariah Carey have in common?

Neither of us know the words to any of her songs

Whats the word im looking for?

You're part of a three-man space crew orbiting Earth. You can ONLY relay one, one word message in 2 seconds. Whats the word

How good are you at PowerPoint?

I said, "I Excel at it." He replied, "Was that a Microsoft Office pun " I was like, "Word."

Which dinosaur knew... Q: Which dinosaur knew the most words?

A: The thesaurus.

What word starts with "n" and you never want to call a black person?

Neighbor

How do you say the word "peanuts" *without* the letter "t"?

Think about it.

What's another word for Italian cologne?

Garlic

How can the National Anthem be racist if?

The first words are, " Jose can you see "

What word allows you to take away two letters and get one?

Stone.

Why was 4 afraid of 5?

Because 5 was a Registered Six Offender. Edit: a word.

How do you pay for things in the Czech Republic?

Cash or Czech Edit: a word

Why won't people know when you replace words with instruments?

Idk, accordion to research I guess.

Why are ghosts always just moaning?

Did your manners die too Use your words!

How do you describe a hierarchy of police officers with only one word?

Police police police police police police police police police police police.

What did the verb say when the words have, has, and had were removed from the English language?

A: "Nobody's perfect!"

What word starts with F and ends with UCK?

Firetruck

Why do you keep changing a word into something that makes no sense ?

You are the banner of my existence.

What word that begins with "N" and ends with "R" do you never want to call a black person?

Neighbor

What were the last words Jimi Hendrix said before he died?

S'cuse me, while I kiss the sky...*

What does a blonde say when you asked her what the last two words of the national anthem are?

A: Play ball.

What word starts with N and ends with R and you never want to call a black person?

Neighbor

Why did the librarian hush the mime?

Because actions speak louder than words.

What word starts with N and ends with R and you never want to call a black guy?

Neighbor

Where'd he go?

and the angel said, "He's at IHOP for never-ending pancakes" and they were like, "Word."

What word in the dictionary is always spelled wrong?

Wrong.

What two words contain the most letters?

A: Post office.

What do you can an epileptic What do you call an epileptic in a garden?

Seizure salad. edit: fixed the word 'call'

What is the only word that a redneck will capitalise?

Punishment.

Which word is the longest in the English language?

Smiles - because there is a mile between the first and last letters

What does a rapper use to write their songs?

Word,yo.

Who's there ! Aladdin ! Aladdin who ?

Aladdin the street wants a word with you !

How are men like television commercials?

A. You can't believe a word either one of them says and they both last about 30 seconds.

What's the problem with your marriage?

WIFE: He replaces words with animal names just to annoy me ME: I don't do it on porpoise

How many amateur masochists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one; But it takes a WHOLE E.R. room to extract it afterwards. Double joke! "whole... hole." it's a play on words ;)

Do you know what the word 'was' was initially?

Before was was was was was is.

Ever wondered why bees hum?

It's because they don't know the words.

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Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

Where did Christ get his ripped abs?

Cross fit

What do you get when you cross a motorcycle and a truck?

hit by a car.

4 Jokes More 4 Jokes

Why do women talk so much?

Because they have 4 lips.

What did the Japan team say after the first half of the Women's World Cup?

I, 4-1, know we won't win."

Spell Jokes More Spell Jokes

Why is it spelled 'cancelled' in the UK, but 'canceled' in the US?

Because the US gave the UK that L back in 1776.

Why are hemorrhoid and diarrhea so hard to spell?

Like if you're talking about them, you aren't having a rough enough time already.

C O R R E C T L Y Jokes More C O R R E C T L Y Jokes

What is the only word in an English dictionary spelled incorrectly?

Incorrectly is the only word spelled I n c o r r e c t l y

What 11 letter word does every Yale graduate spell incorrectly?

I n c o r r e c t l y

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

How do you keep a idiot occupied?

I will tell you how in my next post- Jk the answer's in one of the comments, look through every single one and you are destined to discover the answer.

What did Tarzan say when he saw a heard of elephants?

Oh look! A heard of elephants.

Long Word Jokes More Long Word Jokes

What is the longest word in the English language?

SMILES because there is a mile between the first and last letters!

What's the longest word in English?

smiles. Because there's a mile between both S.

Spread Jokes More Spread Jokes

What do STDs and jokes have in common?

They're both easily spread.

Why do SJWs hate cannibals?

They're always man-spreading on their sandwiches.

Orbit Jokes More Orbit Jokes

What do you call a group of cattle sent into orbit?

The first herd shot round the world!

What's it called when a planet orbits its sun 8 times?

An orbyte