Eve Jokes

Where is the first baseball game in the Bible?

In the big inning. Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel. The Giants and the Angels were rained out.

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What was the first thing Adam said to Eve?

Stand back! I don't know how big it's going to get!

What time of day was Adam born?

Just a little before Eve

What makes fish smell?

One fine morning in Eden, God was looking for Eve, but couldn't find them. God saw Adam and asked where Eve was? Adam replied, "She's down at the Ocean, taking a bath." "Damn," says God, "now all the fish will smell."

What did adam say to eve?

Let's save humanity.

What did the pro bono plastic surgeon say to their patient on Dec 31st?

Happy new ears Eve!

What did Adam say the day before Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve!

What did Adam say to Eve on the day before Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve."

What were Adam's first ever words to Eve?

Stand back - I don't know how big it's going to get!"

What where Adam's first words to Eve?

Don't wash it in there, you'll make the fish smell like that!"

What did God say after she made Eve?

Practice makes perfect."

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What did the snake day to Adam after he bit the apple?

You owe Eve an O.

How do we know God likes condoms?

Because Adam was ribbed for Eve's pleasure

What is one of the first things that Adam and Eve did after they were kicked out?

A. They really raised Cain.

How do we know that Adam and Eve weren't black?

You can't take a rib from a black man

What did Adam say to Eve the first time he got an erection?

Stand back, I don't know how big this thing is gonna get!"

What didn't Adam and Eve have that everyone else has?

Parents.

Why did Eve want to move to New York ?

She fell for the Big Apple !

What did Adam say when he broke up with Eve?

I'm turning over a new leaf.

Who were the first people not to read the apple ToC?

Adam and Eve

How did Adam and Eve feel when expelled from the Garden of Eden?

A. They were really put out.

Who was the world's first carpenter?

Eve, because she made Adam's banana stand.

Why did Eve bite the forbidden apple?

Because it tasted better than Adam's banana.

What did Adam say to his wife on the day before Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve!

How do you know that Adam and Eve were white?

Have you ever tried taking a rib from a black man

What did Adam say to Eve on Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve.

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Wavy hair.

Why does the ocean roar?

You would too if you had crabs on your bottom and oysters in your bed.

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Falafel Raptors. (sorry)

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Why'd you name me Carson, dad?

You were born in a car. Now go fetch your sister, Hospitaldaughter. It's time for tablemeal.

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What do you call a projectile that is very good at finding friends?

A homie missile.

What did Euler find in his toilet?

A natural log

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How much for the giant, walk-in medicine cabinet?

Sir, this is a liquor store."

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What happens when you mix Jared from Subway and Bill Cosby?

I don't know; It was too long ago, and I can't remember.

How do you know when a politician is lying?

Their mouth is moving.