Chinese Jokes

What do you call a Chinese millionare?

Ching-Ching.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

Why don't Chinese people roll 12lb balls down wooden lanes to knock over pins?

Because to them it's boring.

What do you call 3 Puerto Ricans, 1 Chinese Man, and 4 black guys?

A water sprinkler.

What would you get if you crossed the Easter Bunny with Chinese food?

Hop suey!

What did the Chinese cowboy say?

Nii haw!

How do you make the best Americanized Chinese food?

Like Tso.

How many of you believe in psychokinesis?

Raise my hand. - Taken from local Chinese joint fortune cookie.

How much does a Chinese dumpling weigh?

It weighs *Won-ton*

What would happen if all Chinese people jumped off a chair, all at the same time?

I don't know either, but you would need a reeeally big chair!

What do you call a dirty Chinese crab?

A crusty asian

How do the Chinese vote?

With their erections.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

Why don't the Chinese have casinos?

Because they don't like Tibet

Why did the Chinese chicken cross the road?

The eggrolled

Why do Asian people never seem to age?

I met a chinese girl today & I estimate her age to be somewhere between 4 & 197.

What do chinese people do when they have an erection?

they vote

What does a Chinese bear fry eggs in?

A pan, duh!

How do you know if a Chinese man has robbed your house?

Your homework is done, your computer is upgraded, and two hours later, he's still trying to back out of your driveway.

Why do Chinese workers work so hard?

Because their companies are always short-staffed.

Why do Chinese people love NY?

Because they heard we sell hotdogs for $0.75 each.

How many Chinese workers does it take to make a Smartphone?

I dunno. Ask the kids.

What do you call a Chinese man with a bad internet connection?

Hi Ping

What do you call a chinese Jehovah's witness?

Ding Dong

What is Captain Picard's favorite Chinese takeout ?

Make it Tso!

What do you call a chinese poker face?

A mahjong face

How does the average Chinese worker find a new job?

ChinkedIn.

How heavy is a Chinese dumpling?

Wonton.

What do Asians meeting up at their favorite Chinese take-out say?

Where my dogs at "

What does Korean food taste like?

Chinese food.

What do you call a Chinese man with a bad sense of direction?

Wong Wei

Where do Chinese people find work?

On ChinkedIn of course. (I know the pun is racist but I had to share. Sorry.)

What do you call a Chinese orange?

A Mandarin

How does a Chinese family name their children?

They throw 3-9 pots and pans down a flight of stairs.

What sound does a Chinese doorbell make?

Ching Chong

What do you call a fake Chinese iPhone?

A slanted-iPhone

What's a let down Chinese lobster called?

A crushed asian

Why cant you make fun of Chinese people?

Because its just wong

What does a Chinese restaurant serve for Easter?

Coloured eggrolls!

What do you get when you cross and Chinese and a Mexican man?

A: A car thief who can't drive!

Why couldn't the Chinese geologist find a date?

He was vehemently opposed to wrong rocks on the beach.

What did the Chinese man say when he found out his mother died?

I can't bereave it!

Why didn't King Kong go to Hong Kong?

He didn't like Chinese food.

Where do Chinese people live?

Chinatown

What did the Chinese man say when ophthalmologist told him he had a cataract?

No, I have a Rincoln Continental!*

How does a Chinese cat say hello?

Mi Hao.

Why do Chinese warriors die so easily in battle?

No matter how much protective garments they wear, there's still a chink in the armor.

You might also enjoy:

Halo Jokes More Halo Jokes

Why didn't Bungie stick with Halo?

Because it wasn't their Destiny.

How do angels greet each other?

They say Halo.

Description Jokes More Description Jokes

What's the difference between an American zoo and a Chinese zoo?

An American zoo will only have a description of the animal. The Chinese zoo has the price and recipe of the animal.

What is the difference between a Southern Zoo and a Northern Zoo?

A Southern Zoo has a description of the animal on the cage along with a recipe.

Chinese Man Jokes More Chinese Man Jokes

How do you make a Chinese man no longer Asian?

Just spin him around in circles until he's disoriented

What did the Chinese man say when he found out his mother died?

I can't bereave it!

Cover Jokes More Cover Jokes

Why were the Three Wise Men covered in soot?

Because they came from afar.

What do you use to cover a herpetarium floor?

Reptiles.

Food Jokes More Food Jokes

What do you call food between two slices of bread?

a sandwich

What does the lion say to his friends before they go out hunting for food?

Let us prey.

Price Jokes More Price Jokes

What do you call a hotel special that lets policemen stay for two nights for the price of one?

CuNO3!

What's the difference between an American zoo and a Chinese zoo?

An American zoo will only have a description of the animal. The Chinese zoo has the price and recipe of the animal.

Bus Jokes More Bus Jokes

What is a bus ?

A: A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.

What's the worst part about 30 lawyers in a bus going over a cliff?

The bus could fit 30 more lawyers.

Chinese Food Jokes More Chinese Food Jokes

What did Picard say when Riker asked him what kind of Chinese food he wanted?

Make it Tso's Number One."

What does Korean food taste like?

Chinese food.