Pilot Jokes

What do you call a black man flying an airplane?

Pilot.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What's the difference between a Pilot and a jet engine?

A jet engine stops whining after it lands

Who survived?

The pilot who jumped out with a parachute.

Why's Guantanamo Bay full of actors?

Because they all shot pilots.

Why did the plane crash?

Because the pilot was a loaf of bread! Now he's toast

Why did the airplane crash into the building?

BECAUSE THE PILOT WAS A LOAF OF BREAD!

How do you know you're talking to a pilot?

Don't worry, they'll tell you.

Why did the plane crash into the mountain?

Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What do you call a Chinese pilot?

A pilot you racist!

Why did the plane crash into the ocean?

The pilot was a loaf of bread

Who's there? Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock Knock KNOCK KNOCK. Who is there?

The pilot.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

Why did the pilot hit the Alps?

To get to the other side.

How do you find the pilot at a party?

He'll tell you.

Why did the English major break up with the pilot?

Because the pilot kept ending sentences with a preposition, over.

What do you call a black guy who flies a plane?

A PILOT, YOU RACIST!

What do you call a black guy who can fly a plane?

A pilot what else would you call him? You racist prick!

What did the pilot say to the co-pilot right before the UPS plane crash in Alabama?

Too soon.

Why did the airplane crash?

The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why was the actor detained by airport security?

He said he was in town to shoot a pilot.

What kind of pizza do pilots like?

Plain.

Why did the airplane fall out of the sky?

Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

Why did the Boeing 747 crash into an orphanage?

Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

What did the pilot who fail flying school did when he went home?

Got high.

Why are pilots so honest?

Keep those maintenance issues quiet. I want lies, frankly. "We're delayed because we're winning a safety award."

How can you tell if there is a pilot in the room?

He will tell you.

What do you call an asian who flies planes?

A pilot.

How did the pilot like his hotdog?

Plane.

Why was the pilot jealous of the chef?

Because of his ground thyme.

Why did the 2 contractors hire a pilot to help survey their land?

Because they really wanted a third's eye view!

What did the pilot say when his plane wasn't flying?

Aw man, that's a drag."

How many pilots does it take to change a light bulb?

None it is done by the automatic pilot.

How do you tell if there's a Pilot in the room?

They've already told you.

What's your heigth and position?

Pilot: Well I'm 6 foot tall and I'm sitting front left.

What should we call ourselves?

How about 22 pilots "Idk. Seems like an awful lot of pilots" 21 pilots "Omg"

What's the difference between god and pilots?

God doesn't think he's a pilot.

What do you call a Muslim who is also a pilot?

Greg if you're a friend, Gregory if you were introduced, Mr. Abdalla if you're doing business with one another.

Why was the pilot dying?

Because he had terminal cancer.

How can you tell if someone is a pilot?

They'll just tell you.

What do you call a pilot who tries to tell a joke but gets distracted and crashes his plane into a building?

A comickaze

Why did the pilot crash the plane?

Because he was a slice of bread

Why does the news keep telling people the pilot was depressed?

Does any of this really matter...

You might also enjoy:

Pirate Jokes More Pirate Jokes

How much do pirates pay for their earrings?

About a buccaneer!

Why did the pirate go to Ireland?

he thought he was going to Arrrland.

Fly Jokes More Fly Jokes

What flies around your light at night and can bite off your head ?

A tiger moth !

Why couldn't Billy the Jet go flying with his friends?

Because he was grounded.

God Jokes More God Jokes

What is a million years like to you?

God: Like one second. Mortal: What is a million dollars like to you God: Like one penny. Mortal: Can I have a penny God: Just a second.

How do we know God is not a woman?

Because the Earth is not a sandwich!

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Why did the Eskimos have to stop partying?

because they ran out of Natural Light

Why did the masochist STOP hitting himself on the head with a hammer ?

Because it hurt.

Awful Lot Jokes More Awful Lot Jokes

Who has two thumbs and looks an awful lot like Alec Baldwin?

Alec Baldwin

What do you call a group of Ocelot?

An Awful-lot.

English Jokes More English Jokes

What gift do you want?

HUSBAND: "An English girl." After a month, wife returns.. HUSBAND: "Where is my gift " WIFE: "Wait for nine months!"

What is the only English word a French-Canadian knows?

Sorry.

Co Jokes More Co Jokes

What's Whitney Houston's favorite type of co-ordination?

HAAAANNNNNNNDDDDDDDDD EYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!

What did the Baskin-Robbins manager say to the employee that wanted to date a co-worker?

Don't poop where you scoop.

Accept Jokes More Accept Jokes

What do women and modern computers have in common?

Neither one will accept a 3 and a half inch floppy

What's the difference between a woman and a computer?

A computer will accept a 3 1/2 inch floppy.