Underwear Jokes

What brand of underwear did Jesus wear?

Fruit of the Womb

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Why don't witches wear underwear?

So they can get a better grip of the broom. :)

Why does the Pope keep his underwear on while bathing?

Because he doesn't like looking down on the unemployed. First to ever post this joke here, yay!

Why do priests wear underwear in the shower?

They don't like to look down on the unemployed

Why don't chickens wear underwear?

Because their peckers are on their faces.

What kind of underwear does a person wear when buried?

Fruit of the tomb

Why didn't the egg break?

Because it was wearing underwear.

Why don't black girls wear underwear to cookouts?

To keep the flies off the fried chicken.

Why doesn't a rooster wear underwear?

becuase his peckers on his head

What brand of underwear do zombies wear?

Haaaaaannnnnneeeeeessssss

What did Anna Freud let her underwear show?

It was a Freudian slip

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How did the Neanderthal dad teach his son how to wear underwear?

Color coded: "Yellow in front, brown in the back"

What kind of underwear do old people wear?

Depends.

Why don't birds wear underwear?

Because, their pecker is on their head.

This joke may have profanity.

What kind of underwear does a math-obsessed mermaid wear?

An algae bra.

What kind of underwear do the GI Joes wear?

None, they go commando.

Where does the pervert keep the underwear he steals?

In his briefcase!

What do you call a woman who's not wearing underwear?

A barracuchi.

Why shouldn't you buy underwear made in the Ukraine?

Because Chernobyl fallout.

Why doesn't a chicken wear underwear?

Because his pecker is on his face!

This joke may have profanity.

Where'd my boomerang go?

Under there "Under where " Hahaha I just made you say "underwear" *boomerang hits me in the back of the head*

Why don't chicken wear underwear?

Because their pecker is on their face.

This joke may have profanity.

What type of underwear does a fetus wear?

Fruit of the womb.

What do you call a whale that isn't wearing any underwear?

Free Willy

Why's he in his underwear?

Batman: So we match. Look, this isn't about me.

How can you tell when a Serbian girl isn't wearing any underwear?

By the dandruff on her shoes.

What sort of underwear does the ghost of a French baker wear?

Boulangerie.

What kind of underwear does John Grisham use?

Pelican Briefs I'll go find a bridge

Why is it hard to hold a speech at a nudist convention?

It does not help to imagine people in their underwear.

Why do they make the underwear so fancy?

No one is ever going to see it anyway. Me: Uh huh.

Why dont witches wear underwear?

So they can get a good grip on the broomstick

Why don't roosters wear underwear?

Their peckers are on their heads.

Why Colonel had a bunch of underwears ?

Because, Brigadier General asked him to debrief his team.

How do Alabama parents teach their kids to put on their underwear?

Yellow in the front, brown in the back.

What kind of underwear does Severus Snape wear?

Always.

What do you call the underwear of someone experiencing nocturnal emissions?

Dreamcatchers

What's the difference between Super Man and Spider Man ?

Super Man wears his underwear over his pants..

How long did it take for the police to catch the man running in his underwear?

It was a brief chase...

Whatever happened to silk underwear?

A: Fell through the cracks.

Why do blondes wear underwear?

To keep their ankles warm.

Why don't birds ever wear underwear?

Because their pecker is on their head.

This joke may have profanity.

Why should you always wear underwear in Ukraine?

Otherwise Chernobyl Fallout.

Why doesn't a duck wear underwear?

Because their pecker's on their face.

This joke may have profanity.

What is the difference between an UNDERWEAR &amp?

a STAGE CURTAIN? A: When you pull down the STAGE CURTAIN, the show is over, but when you pull down the UNDERWEAR..... it's SHOWTIME!!!

Why shouldn't you buy underwear from the Ukraine?

Chernobyl fall out.

You might also enjoy:

Priest Jokes More Priest Jokes

How are a Christmas tree and a priest alike ?

They both have ornamental balls.

What do you call enchilada sauce bkessed by a priest?

A: HOLY MOLE' Thank you, I'll be in r/dadjokes all week!

Forget Jokes More Forget Jokes

Why was Princess Peach worried when Mario wanted to use her laptop?

She forgot to delete her Bowser history

Why should you distrust atoms?

Because they make up an awful lot of stuff. EDIT: Because I forgot about neutrinos.

Cosmonaut Jokes More Cosmonaut Jokes

Why did the cosmonaut forget to pack extra underwear?

Because he was Russian.

What do you call a baby Cosmonaut?

Yuri Googoogagarin. I'll see myself out...

Navy Jokes More Navy Jokes

What do you call a Mexican stationed out at sea?

A Navy Bean

What do you call a snail in the Navy?

A Snailor

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What is Jesus' favorite mathematical operation?

The Cross Product

Why is Jesus' body bread?

Because given enough time it rises

Well Grip Jokes More Well Grip Jokes

Why don't witches wear underwear?

So they can get a better grip of the broom. :)

Why do witches go commando when riding around on their brooms?

Better grip. Happy Halloween :)

Hurry Jokes More Hurry Jokes

What's brownish and runs on oil?

Jesus in a hurry.

What do you call a dinosaur that's in a hurry?

A Prontosaur.

Chernobyl Jokes More Chernobyl Jokes

What do you call a nuclear-powered car?

A mobile-Chernobyl!

How many people from Chernobyl does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None. They glow in the dark.