Roll Jokes

What is yellow and rolls down a hill?

Mustard in a rollerskate

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

Which Way Do Transformers Put The Toilet Paper?

Autobots Roll Out!

Why did ISIS leader bring a car-door to the desert?

So he could roll down the window when it gets too hot. How we joke in Kurdistan

What is Harry Potters favourite way to get down a hill?

Walking. Jk. Rolling

What do you call a clown and a crook rolling in feces?

The US elections.

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill?

To get to the bottom

What do you call a basketball that rolls off court and deflates?

Out of bounce.

How do you teach your dog to roll over ?

Put him on fire.

Why can't Elvis Presley roll backwards with his car?

Because he is dead

What did Sushie A say to Sushi B?

Wasa-B! Let's roll.

Why did the orange stop rolling down the hill?

It ran out of juice. I shall take my leave now.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

What do you do with 365 used condoms?

Roll them into a tire and call it a Goodyear.

What happened when Rick fell down a hill?

Rick rolled.

Why is it called Justice League of America?

Do they follow territorial boundaries? If the Kaos Kommandos start a brawl in El Paso and it rolls over into Juarez, do they say "screw it, let Justice League of Mexico handle it"? (Sorry if this isn't technically a joke; it was my shower thought this morning and I thought it was funny.)

What's grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow?

An elephant rolling down a hill with a daisy in its mouth!

Why do nursing homes give men Viagra before they sleep?

So they won't roll out of bed.

This joke may have profanity.

How does Harry Potter travel about?

Walking -Jk Rolling

Why do the nurses give the old men in retirement homes Viagra?

To keep them from rolling out of bed

This joke may have profanity.

What do potheads do when they see a fire?

Stop, drop, and roll

How do you find the fastest man in Africa?

Roll a penny down a hill.

What did the stone say to the hill?

Let's Rock and Roll.

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in dirt and then cross the road again?

Because he was a dirty double crosser!

What is red and white and red and white and red and ....?

Santa Clause rolling down a hill

What kind of car does a Japanese chef drive?

Rolls Rice

What's the best way to save on toilet paper?

Slow your roll.

What does Optimus Prime say on 4-20?

Autobots, roll up!

Why do old men take Viagra?

It stops them from rolling out of bed.

This joke may have profanity.

What's black and white and black and white and black and white and green?

A skunk rolling down a hill with a pickle in its mouth.

What do you get when you roll weed on a dictionary?

High Definition

What did Johann Sebastian Bach do when someone steam-rolled his organ?

He played a flat baroque piece!

What did the pastry chef say to his apprentice?

Know your roll!"

What do you call an Irishman with no arms and no legs who's rolling down a hill?

Rick O'Shay.

What happens when you throw a laptop into the ocean?

You have a Dell, rolling in the deep.

What came first?

A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is leaning against the headboard smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face. The egg, looking a bit ticked off, grabs the sheet, rolls over and says ... "Well, I guess we finally answered THAT question!"

What did the Mexican say with one sleeve rolled up and one sleeve not?

Not even, homes

What do you call a laptop in the ocean?

A Dell, rolling in the deep.

What's red and white and red, red and white and red and white?

Santa Claus rolling down a roof!

Why do scuba divers roll backwards out of the boat?

Cause if they rolled forwards, they would still be in the boat.

How can you tell if someone has a Jamaican accent?

They roll their J's.

What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling around in pain on the ground?

Shoot him again.

Why did the Orange stop rolling?

It ran out of juice!!!

What are these?

Me: The synonym rolls you asked for. Wife: CINNAMON.

Why were the locals dissapointed when an old, decrepit, broken down bus rolled into an Egyptian town?

They wished it was Anubis.

Why did the paper follow the pencil?

Because it LED THE WAY! I'm on a roll here! this is fun! Skip

Why did the dung beetle go to rehab?

He was rolling balls.

What is big and red and rolls over in the snow?

Santa Claus hit in the balls!

What did the mother turkey say to her naughty son Tom?

If your dad knew how you were acting he'd roll over in his gravy

How do you play a big game of Hungry Hippos?

Go to a weight watchers meeting and roll Maltesers down the middle of their meeting circle.

What is Italian-American foreplay?

Hey! Wake up and roll over!"

What's a feminist's least favourite bread?

Gender rolls

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll around in mud, and cross again after being caught by the mafia?

Because he was a dirty double crosser.

Why is the orange Rolling down the road?

Because it's run out of juice!!!!!! (:

Why do men get erections while they sleep?

So they don't accidentally roll out of bed.

What's black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white?

A Penguin rolling down a hill What's black and white and laughing The penguin who pushed him

How the hell did you do that"?

The car rolled on it".

What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in the mud and crosses back over?

A dirty double crosser.

What do pothead barbarians say when 420 rolls around?

420 raze it!

What is both a short shopping list, and a potential Chinese luxury automobile?

Rolls * Rice

What do you call a pc that fell in the ocean?

A Dell rolling in the deep.

What do you call Stephen Hawking rolling away from an explosion?

Hot wheels (First joke, hope you like it.)

What's red and white, red and white, red and white?

Sant rolling off your roof.

What do you call a woman rolling around on a beach?

Sandy

What did the pig say when his brother rolled on him?

Heavy!"

What's the real reason old men take Viagra?

So they don't roll out of bed!

This joke may have profanity.

Why don't Chinese people roll 12lb balls down wooden lanes to knock over pins?

Because to them it's boring.

What is it with people who text and drive?

I swear to god the next time I see this happen, I'll roll down my window and throw my beer at them.

What do you call a tank rolling through the streets of poland?

Ghetto Blaster

What's Mr. Skeltal's favorite candy?

Dootsie rolls.

What goes Black-White, Black-White, Black-White?

A panda bear rolling down a hill.

How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?

No one knows it's never happened.

What's black and white black and white black and white?

A nun rolling down a hill.

What goes red and white, red and white, red and white?

Santa Claus rolling down a hill.

What's a feminist's least favorite food?

Gender rolls

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and crossed the road again?

Because he was a dirty double-crosser!

How do you start a black parade?

Roll a 40 down the street.

What type of music do lightning bolts listen to?

Rock and Roll

What's Sisyphus' least favourite type of music?

Rock and Roll.

Why did the dog roll down the hill?

It didn t have any legs.

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the dirt, then cross back over?

Because he's a dirty double crosser.

Why didn't the quarter roll down the hill with the nickle?

Because it had more cents

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How do you sell chicken to a deaf man?

A: HEY, YOU WANNA BUY SOME CHICKEN !!!!!!!

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottsman?

Mick Jagger says "Hey, you, get off of my cloud!" A Scottsman says "Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe!"

Scottsman Jokes More Scottsman Jokes

What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottsman?

Mick Jagger says "Hey, you, get off of my cloud!" A Scottsman says "Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe!"

What's the difference between the Rolling Stones and a Scottsman?

The Rolling Stones say "Hey! You! Get off of my cloud!" And a Scottsman says "Hey McLeod, get of me ewe!"

Hill Jokes More Hill Jokes

What goes Black-White, Black-White, Black-White?

A panda bear rolling down a hill.

How do you make a Swiss Roll?

Push him down a hill. BONUS: How do you make French Wine? Invade.

Hey Ma Cleod Jokes More Hey Ma Cleod Jokes

What's the difference between Mick Jagger, and a Scottish farmer?

Mick Jagger says 'Hey, you, get off of my cloud' The Scottish farmer says 'Hey, MacLeod, get off of my ewe'

What's the difference between a Scotsman and the Rolling Stones?

The Rolling Stones say 'hey you, get off my cloud.' the Scotsman says 'hey MaCleod, get off my ewe.'

Thesaurus Jokes More Thesaurus Jokes

How is this joke similar to a musical about a thesaurus?

Both are a play on words.

Why did the thesaurus have a creeping feeling?

He had an antonym.

Burger Jokes More Burger Jokes

Which burgers can tell your fortune?

Medium burgers!

Where do burgers go when they die?

Burgatory

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What kind of dogs are full of Chinese scientists?

Yellow labs

What kind of jackets do Audiophiles wear?

FLAC jackets

Transformer Jokes More Transformer Jokes

What do you call a Transformer that engages in illegal activities?

Optimus .

Who is the best underwater Transformer?

Octopus Prime!