Well, if you hadn't been so fresh last night, we wouldn't have ended up in this jam!"
Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
Coffee Mug
Glue a penny to the bottom of a swimming pool ALTERNATE ENDING: Put a scratch n' sniff at the bottom of a swimming pool
Gary Glitters boots.
At the end, they get a bag of chips and a Coke. -My dad told me this joke when we went to a race-
Because it was charged with battery.
One's a plucked pheasant, and I don't remember how it ends, but your mother's a whore.
It's never ending.
hint* it starts with P and ends with S. Pens! :D ... wait what were YOU THINKING ! ! !
The optimist sees the light at the end of the tunnel. The pessimist sees nothing. And the realist sees the train.
Because I'm about to introduce myself to the girl at the end of the bar.
They're both summary!
Couple's Daily Question Mug
They get Hungary so they go for Turkey.
Torres went and asked Paul proudly, "How many goals will I end up with after thia this World Cup " Paul died laughing.
It starts with a little blowing but at the end your house is gone
It was a long road, but I ended up coming out a head.
I'm not ready to dye, I still have a few ends to tie up. "Ball up..."
El Taco Lips.
Player: "1:1"
Because now his watch has ended.
A: FIRETRUCK.
The bogeyman.
A: Because they can't spell tobbagan.
Hint: starts with an N and ends with an R Neighbor
The magician returns your wallet at the end of the performance
A coconut.
Fire truck.
We were bound to get together...
Two. One to screw it almost all the way in and one to give it a surprising twist at the end.
It was rear-ended by a ferry.
Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis
The punchline.
Bridget the end of the world !
Just asking for a friend
If it ends up on your wall you're probably retarded.
On the end of monsters fingers.
They always end in a draw
Me: Please hold all questions until the end.
A: Endless Bread!
well, the movie ended so
Prepear for the end.
Here is mine: Q: Where do snowmen dance --------- A: At the snowball. Best joke at the end of a Popsicle stick
Me: Before I tell you let's talk about ending sentences with prepositions.
That's the end of me!"
if you don't nail them right, they'll end up at your neighbor's.
The digestive system is a system which starts with one hole and ends with one hole
Because they have rubbers on their end.
a couple decades ago they had a three way with Russia that ended poorly
This is the end of me !
I say "Yes I do". End of discussion.
Only one but he has to have a nurse to tell him which end to screw in.
You break it up.
Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs !
The game ends when they catch the snitch
At the other end of the telescope.
A: The same reason they sing Hymns instead of Hers!
Miscarriage
Somebody took a corner!
he thinks to himself.
Hiss is the end of the line for you !
envelope
Neighbor.
Don't do it, man, you'll never hear the end of it!"
A witch with a blindfold !
He falls off
Miscarriage. This joke never gets old, just like the baby.
removed
It's stale, mate."
Ey mon.
x-post from /r/punny Because you can't end on a prep position.
Firetruck. The answer is Firetruck.
This is the end.
Elderly me: I made my kids steak instead of hot dogs. Him: *gasps* You monster.
A ditch.
Tell her to calm down. You're dead now but the argument is over.
Popcorn.
In the end, both are lucky to produce a stool.
because Happy Hour ended.
Because honey is what you find at the end of bee trails (betrayals)
Because it ran out of cluck !
Coconut.
None, they were all minerals.
Beacause a little water ends both of them !
By letting the hungry die.
Front-end
Neighbor" thanks bugz
A: They're intended for children but it's the men who usually end up playing with them.
At the end of the day I'm just a guy in a bikini on the bus.
Pupil: I want to know how it ends !
Neighbor
in prism
A tail pail!
Both end up with you being chased by the police if you go too fast.
Allahu akbar
A coconut
Because they were both too Shellfish.
4: McDonalds The end
It doesn't matter. Both ends stop.
Flush the punch bowl
Coconut
Nevermind, this riddle is too easy.
Get off me dad you're crushing my smokes! Or "That'll do pig, that'll do." I have heard it both ways.
The silence of the lambs
Pages from *Reader's Digest*
A library, because there are so many stories. (Did Not Make Up this Joke)
Four one to hold the pot and three to act macho and shake the stove.
Where's popcorn?
You take the letter "f" out of the word "way" (there's no f in way) *joke works best when the person being asked the question has to think about it for some time and says the phrase themselves without realizing what they said
Yell bingo.
Have an ice day!
A: A snowmobile!
They have a huge clock right in the middle of the town.
An Iceburgh.
One's gotta pee.
A beautiful dress can make one girl look gorgeous... A bottle of whiskey can make all girls look gorgeous.
