Man: The thief was spending less than my wife. Police: Then why are you reporting it now Man: I think now the thief's wife has started using it!
Couple's Daily Question Mug
Coffee Mug
To steal a Reddit User's post on the other side.
What have I got to luge
Because they always steal doubloons
I'm at your service ma'am.
A: It stole the show!
One steals from the people the other peals from the steeple.
One less now, because the one who tried to steal the light bulb was shot by the cops.
Because someone stole his thunder
Imagines using 'the force' to steal everyone's cats and building a cat army To keep the peace
A bird who steals !
Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
Because they keep stealing all the green cards.
Nobody knows - they usually lose count at 800 rounds.
They can shoot and steal without being arrested.
Escargot stolen.
She calls the flying squad !
You can't steal a real car a few bits at a time
Trying to steal the hubcaps off a moving car.
In case you get a hole-in-one (stolen from some girl at school)
Straight jack it.
You think a burglar broke in and was like "Cute top!"
A stole.
Your job.
They would steal all the boos.
Rubbit. Stole this from a friend.
The old one was made of steal.
He was delighted.
One ruins girls clothes and steals crab legs, the other one is also losing the Rose Bowl.
Because there is nothing to steal there
Someone who steals your job then doesn't show up.
They always steal the green card.
It was worth the whisk
Grand Theft Ottoman
Because he had my grains
Click Turpin
Stop being shellfish!" *drops microphone, walks away*
A hot tamole
A whisk taker.
Me: So they can buy stuff. 4: Why don't they just steal the stuff She's a criminal mastermind.
Bed buglars.
A Mugging.
A: Someone stole the book.
Because she stole his heart
Offender stole more than he could carry by swimming
The robber ducky
He was convicted of fragrancy.
Because the thief was spending less than his wife.
Because everything is a steal.
Carlos.
The thief was spending less then his wife.
Robber ducks !
Because I'm tired of running and he's catching up....
A: She saw "911" on the back and thought it was a Porsche.
Vending machines.
It had a sticker that said 'intel inside'.
He stole her blanket.
His brother with the DVR
Robber ducks.
2) Do you have a girlfriend 1) Why are you stealing from our refrigerator
The Queen Bean. *Blatantly stolen from Ren & Stimpy
Because they keep stealing all the Green Cards
They steal all the green cards.
a) I don't know he also stole my watch.
Otherwise there's nothing worth toking.
Denim denim denim.(http://youtu.be/rdnTvgK2o5I) shamelessly stolen from tumblr
Fred: A bird that steals ma'am.
Because he my take your ride but he will never take your freon.
The 2 nigerians that stole my trunk
A hamburglar!
Because it invovles running, shooting, and stealing.
Rabbit Hood.
A pyrite!
A talking frog! Stolen from "Friends" still hilarious.
Because the poor didn't have any !
The black ones steal your watch and the yellow ones paint your nails.
If you leave yogurt alone for 200 years it will develop its own cultures without having to resort to stealing others.
Husband : Keep it in his books. I know he will never touch them....
Oh baby ewe...you got what I knead!"
Sony Playstation
Carlos
Pupil : It's stolen !
Your sole is mine!
You turn on the lights and shoot the black guy stealing it.
I stole an ostrich, it chases me around the house all day, i hate it
An iceberglar
A hot potato.
What goes "snap crackle and pop" A firefly with a short circuit !
Steal her saucer.
Edison.
I don't know but it was hard as hell stealing thier wheelchairs with pieces of Richard Simmons tripping me up.
What if I run a truck along your back Steal your toy Throw a ball Spit food at you - My toddler, wooing the dog
Their kids would be too lazy to steal.
Person 1: To defend myself. Person 2: Discipline. Me: My girlfriend keeps stealing my fries.
A Redditor.
Bonnie and Clydesdale!
He wanted to be cool.
I love the pokey, mon.
Prisoner: For a lark sir.
No Kia
Old habits die hard
Because they're the largest re-tail-er
The Millenial Falcon.
Billy Eichner has a theory... Billy Eichner says I bet those escaped convicts are going to see Ted 2.
Because he would only do the minimum?
Because it is the only thing left that still belongs to black people.
For drizzle.
Mr. Peanut
A: party poopers
A thief in the knight
Caps and robbers
Put on another coat.
A coat of arms!
Because it didn't have the nerves.
Well, alright." "Girl, I feel with my nerves."
Sneakers.
