A Brazilian. Saw this joke elsewhere and thought i'd share it here.
Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
Coffee Mug
Her: Yep, and pillows don't talk. I think we're bonding.
You never have to hear a dad joke. Edit. Just thought of this at work one day hope it's not a repost
If I was a cop would I do this " *Starts break dancing* That's not as much proof as you think it is
So I punched her in the face. Now she has a reason.
He thought he saw the rotating car washer as a tornado
Friend: "Nothing" Me: "But I thought he got the job! " Friend: "Yes he did."
Bar-B-Q-t but I think you're even cuter !
I'm white and I have only shot up like 2 schools.
A RADICAL muslim. Sorry if I offended anyone but just thought I would share a funny thought I had that I turned into a joke.
Whichever you'll excel in, son."
Couple's Daily Question Mug
I think I'm coming down with something.
asked her mother. 'I don't know' replied Mary 'but the teacher thinks I may have caught decimals.'
When she says she thinks of you like a brother.
ME glaring at Cheryl, who took the last donut: idk, maybe don't hire Cheryl
Exchange him.
Think about it.
Fangtastic!
Mark: We played a guessing game. Mom: But I thought you were having a math exam Mark: That's right.
Deceased
I replied, "I'm not sure, I think they use a crane."
About Warf speed. My mom made this joke up last night at a bbq party. She likes to think she is funnier on holidays. Thanks, Mom.
Cause Russia's been Putin them on notice. Just thought of this.
CNN: If you stare at your hand for a long time it will look weird
You think he's gonna wash the dishes
He thought the ad said '24 carrots'
When the power goes off.
Most people over 50 are scared of them and think they are destroying the fabric of society!
I think I'll just hang around.
I don't know.. I just don't see it.
Munnu : It went good, but lastly they asked me show them my testimonial. Chunnu : So Munnu : I think I showed them the wrong thing.
Soon enough, you're addicted. And broke.
Me: *Thinking about how dogs understand more English words than I understand dog words* Science stuff.
Mistress: Are you done yet Wife: Beige... I think I'll paint the ceiling beige...
Lawyers don't think they're funny, and nobody else thinks they're jokes.
I think that pretty much goes without saying.
Snow Doctor: Don't worry you're fine. But... what did you think a snow blower did
Because he thought he was melting.
He thought it would be a pedicure. sorry.
Just Beer. If you don't get it, think mathematically.
They think all the white pieces are kings.
Eh.
a hummus-sectional ba dum tish! I know that was bad. Please blame my boyfriend, he thought of it.
Because "6, 7 ate".
What I actually heard was "Do you want a fight "
He drank a lot of beer. He ate a lot of beans. *You love it.*
Me: My girlfriend gave it to me. Him: I thought your girlfriend was out of town. Me: I did too...
Not good. Too many red flags. *Flashback to her house being covered with USSR flags* I think she might be a communist.
He thought it had a lot of potential.
Cellar. No I think she can be repaired !
They think it's about the romance and majesty of Camelto.
He thought it was such Bolshevik.
Eight. And how old will you be on your next birthday Ten. Oh I don't think that's possible. Oh yes it is - I'm nine today.
Because my marks are all 'E's.
Starts breakdancing* Thats not as much proof as you think it is
There are two answere: Time and Boo (from Mario games). Just made this joke up what do you guys think
Me: The kids gave me this *holds up Dad Is #1 mug* W: That's sweet H: Sweet They think I'm pee!
Uncertainty or indifference ' He answered: I don't know and I don't care!'
Exoplanets Thought that one up myself.
Me: I don't know, I think they sell them at Burger King
It was the Bain of his existence.
Batman thinking about his dead parents.
A legosaurus! Randomly made up this the other night, thought I'd share.
Driver: My brakes don't work so I was rushing home before I had an accident.
Because it was always getting set! I think she gets it from her mother.
She thought to yell for help, but her husband was nowhere around to grant her permission to do so.
Let me talk to a few criminals and see who they think is scariest."
just one of the thoughts I have during important business meetings
Because now I know and I am horrified.
OC I think I'm feeling C6
He says: "Nothing." and disappears.
We think he tried to jump into his pants & fell
a Norsissist.
Well dear... Every time I ask you to close the windows you answer with "Please wait while your computer shuts down"...
The boy responds "Because he closes his eyes when he kisses me."
The other blonde says, "Well duh! You can't see Florida from here."
They always think they're higher then others
Fans thought his sense of humor was a little too on the dark side.
I was asked on an internet forum. "Because you're not allowed to take them on planes," I answered.
He thought they had delivery service.
The other student shrugs and says, "Remains to be seen".
I am in bed and thinking about you ... And you my dear - I am at a club ... And sitting right behind you!!
Because they were Wright.
I think therefore I Amazon
Me: I said "not to be racist" you must be sicker than I thought
His answer: "My mom."
You'd think it was Arby's, but it's actually Long John Silver's.
I'm not a big fan."
He thought he was melting.
So the men can think of a solution in silence.
Because they named him Stevie Twoder.
It's a Nicki Mirage.
Because 31OCT == 25DEC (thank you very much)
They think therefore they arrr
You'd think they'd be hot enough from the flames.
I'd have to say Rushmore, considering he had four heads.
I can't remember the name. I think it starts with T. Really - Ours only starts with gas.
I don't know, me and my wife just thought it had a nice ring to it.
I think I could pull it off
They're radical.
Nyet long. He's always Russian.
None, they didn't Putin enough effort. Just a play on his last name, nothing more.
I need a punchline for a joke.....What happens when a feminist and a sociopath date? OK GO!
No eye-deer. EDIT: I totally messed this joke up. Please give me another chance with another joke
Where's popcorn
It's "popcorn"! What were you thinking?!
Parole.
X-post r/landscaping) Yoshino!!!
Surely you will have guessed - the brooth fairy.
Ginger-bred
Because they would crack each other up.
I told you it would rain, dear.
For Fundsies! I made that one up yesterday so I really hope nobody has heard it before.
They heard he was a fungi
Darth Vader." "Was he 1 of Jesus disciples " "I dunno, I've only seen the 1st movie."
1. And they get 3 credits for it.
